Hot Choclate

2011-11-14T14:48:00.001-08:00

I'm already in bed,I had a long day..fresh out the shower..all I can do is sleep...
She asked me if I wanted dinner I told her "baby,I'm hungry..but all I can do right now..is sleep"

..She goes off into the bathroom to brush her teeth and shower..I'm already dipping my toes in the waters of sleep..
But I hear her come in and she asks me if I'm going to sleep with my earrings on..n when I don't answer she takes them off and puts them on the dresser...

As she stretches over me I can feel her warm skin on me..her breasts pressing on my back as her body cradles mine..
Her fingers caressing me rhythmically..like a soothing lullaby on my skin ...

She kisses the back of my neck..her little hands stroking my chest..stroking my abs...reachin into my sweats...and stroking my dick...
She turns me on my back..and kisses my chest..kisses my abs..then she pulls my sweats down and starts strokin my dick..with her mouth

She sucks on it like this is all she wants to do..her mouth feels like everything...
Her hand is moving inbetween her own thighs..as she moans softly on me..her kitty telling me how bad she wants me in words her mouth transcribes

She straddles me..and lowers herself on me gently..taking me into her slowly..as if savouring it bit by bit...
Till I'm all inside her and she starts to rock slowly..grinding her hips on me ..her hands on my chest..her hair in her face..

Her pussy feels like everything....can't describe what its doin to me..

Her hands felt so good..but her mouth felt much better..her mouth was the cake..but I feel like my dick is in the icing..

I can feel u warm n wet..sucking me in deeper..letting me in..and locking the gates behind me

My hips raise up as ur breasts press against my chest..
Ur coming down on me faster..I'm goin deeper..ure telling me ..and I know its soon..

As ur body starts to shake...I hold on to u and give u everything..

I explode inside u..as u melt on top of me...

And we float down from the ceiling together...

We might have made a baby..

But its ok..

Cus ure my wife...

U whisper "I love u"...and wrap ur arms around me...still inside u...

We're swept away and washed up on the shores of sleep..x

Nobody Better..

2011-11-14T14:41:00.000-08:00

Set the stage..we both shower...a glass of wine in ur hand...ur body wrapped up in a fluffy bathrobe..

music softly playin...streetlights shining in thru cracks in the drapes illuminating the room..

Conversation flowing ....between our lips...between our eyes...and between our bodies..everytime u smile..i wanna taste it...

Candlelight to set the scene flickering flames dramatizing ur curves...shadows playing peek-a-boo with ur body..

I ask u to lie on ur belly...as i take the bathrobe off..drippin oil on ur back as my fingers start to massage from ur lower bk up to ur shoulder blades..

Straddling u..so u can feel the bulge in my pants against ur bum..bending over u gently biting ur earlobe and whispering in ur ear...

Ure so Beautiful...

Kissing the back of ur neck...ur shoulders...tongue dipping in the hollow of ur back...gently biting a buttcheek..makin u giggle

Kissing the back of ur thighs...tickling the back of ur knees with my tongue..lol..making u squirm n wiggle..

Lol..

Turning u over...my lips thirsting for urs..my mouth find urs in the darkness and as our body's press against each other and u moan into my lips i swear i can taste the essence of ur very soul..

Kissin u as if this moment was all i had in the world...as if this was more than i ever hoped for..

My tongue soft and flat..caressing urs..my fingers cuppin ur face...now theyre in ur hair...now theyre on the back of ur neck..slightly parted lips barely brushing against urs..

Teasing u with my tongue..
Kissin ur upper lips like i would kiss ur lower lips..i tell u 1st so u know wat im finna do to u..

Making ur lips hurt in the most pleasurable way..cus they miss mine

Desire threatening to overwhelm me as my hands travel all over ur body..cupping ur breasts as my tongue mks warm wet circles around ur nipples..

Taking them inbetween my teeth gently ..increasing pressure as i flick with my tongue...

Adorning ur body with kisses..my tongue in ur navel...a preview of the damage it could cause inbetween ur thighs...

Coming up to give ur lips some attention..taking ur lower lip inbetween my teeth..sucking on it slow ..as u drip inbetween ur thighs..

Go on n make a mess baby...Im coming down to lick it up...

Close ur eyes..get comfortable..i put a pillow underneath ur bum...i get comfortable myself..cus im gna be down here till i make u cum..

Kissin up ur inner thighs..rubbin my lips on u..over ur panties...
As my fingers slide up... against ur hips..and down... taking ur panties along wth them

Starting light and slow...butterfly kisses as my lips brush against u lightly..
..Suckin on ur lips....running my tongue all over u..in and out...

Licking up ur wetness...up and down...flattening my tongue and lickin u like im tryna wear out an ice cream cone..

Dipping my tongue inside u..fingers raking down ur thighs..blood rushing inbetween ur thighs..making u more sensitive..and more vulnerable to my tongue

Sliding my hands underneath u..cupping ur buttcheeks..i lift that ass off the bed and pedestal the kitty while i eat..

Stabbing u with my tongue..sending shockwaves of pleasure into ur body..till u drip all over urself...
Still i lick it up..licking ur thighs..as i slide the tip of 2 fingers inside u
Twistin them as my tongue finds ur clit..licking u side to side....swirling..tracing my name on it...

I place my palm on ur lower belly and gently push my hand back..liftin up the hood of ur clt as i lick it..

More pleasure than u can stand..my tongue doesnt need any batteries..lemme teach ur rabbit a thing or two..

At first u cant take it...u try to run from it...but as i suck on it... u wrap ur legs around me..and u press my head against u..moaning "right there"

As ur body starts to shake and ur thighs..buttcheeks and toes clench up..i lick faster..till ur body's shuddering in the wake of an orgasm

But im not done..

ur beautiful dark silky hair....once so beautifully arranged...every strand neatly in place...
is now a sexy wild mess...all in ur face..

as ure bent over the couch..one knee on a cushion..the other on the ground...
ur own moistness dripping down ur thigh..ur whole body shaking as i slide eight inches inside u...ur walls sucking me in..ur legs trembling as i pound..

Picking u up...putting u against the wall...ur lips beside my ear..whispering my name as i fill u up..
ur legs wrapped around my waist..as i grind u against the wall..my thighs pumping inbetween urs..pleasures threatening to kill u..

U cant move ..all u can do is get wetter..

and after u cum...i wanna lay u down by the bed..the sweat still glistening on our bodies...
as u hold my head in place inbetween ur thighs..

I'll eat that pussy till u fall asleep ..

Noone can work ur body like me baby

Theres Nobody better....x

falling

2011-11-09T13:29:00.000-08:00

Text in the morning

text at night..

ain even on some simp sht

just checkin my babys alright

but i dont tell u about the inbetweens

the time i spend trying not to think about u

scared to trust it

but wondering how id been living without u..

never been comfortable in love

cus im not allowed to let too much of these feelings show..

i try to act like i dont care as much

but when u look in my eyes i can tell these feelings show...

I feel like the moment i give in

Loves gonna make me pay..

thats why i shrug off compliments

and dont respond to some of the things u say...

but i dont want to lose ur love

cus im too scared to trust it

i built a house with love...

i was too honest..naively i rushed it..

and that house came tumbling down, and i feel like my heart was buried alive underneath the rubble when i lost it..

but i dont want to keep going around in circles...

searching for the future in my past...

ill throw myself off this cliff

and enjoy the fall while it lasts...x

2011-11-02T17:28:00.000-07:00

wish Life had an "undo" button...

and mistakes didnt last forever...

the things i wish i could forget

my mind cant help but remember...

Quickie

2011-11-02T11:02:00.000-07:00

Move ur panties to the side...

Straight into it...no wasted motions...

Horny is what ure feeling...

I want to put it right up where ur heart is...and cum all over ur emotions...

Move ur panties to the side...

Hike that sexy lil dress up...

bend over the table...

f..k that baby..just lift ur leg up....

I moved dem panties to the side..

smell the love in the air..

we only had time for a quickie

but later on tonight...

Tonite baby?....

My mouth will replace ur underwear

Wait until tonite..x

2011-11-02T07:55:00.000-07:00

She never really let go of me

tangled up in these heart strings...

My soul yearns for her....

My body misses her touch..

My lips thirst for her..

My arms miss her in the middle..

She still haunts my mind...

The image of her on ever thought i find...

She's in my dreams and in my fantasies

Imprints of Love left behind..

Come a little closer

My bed needs ur warmth..

My eyes need ur beauty..

My heart needs ur love.

Leave my head alone

U already had ur way with my heart..

but still..id give the broken pieces back to u..

its always going to belong to u..

Even if i get over u..and this broken heart heals

Ur name will be written in the scars.

Come a little Closer...x

Never Lonely...

2011-11-01T16:34:00.000-07:00

U dont even understand..

But u wont let me show u..

See i got all these feelings inside...

and u would feel them too if i kissed u...

u piss me off..but strangely in a good way...

u say the most annoying sht..but i luv it..

u wouldnt talk back if i was in it..

girl if only u knew all the pleasure i could give u..

Fingers in ur hair ..pulling ur head back

lips kissing the curve of ur neck

hands making love to ur body...

slowly helping u out of ur dress...

teeth closing on ur earlobe..

sending shivers down ur spine..

my body pressed against urs..

strong arms holding u in place..tonite ure all mine

fingertips like butterflies....fluttering against ur skin...

tongue playing in ur mouth..

i wanna make u cum till u cant no more...

girl im gna wear u out...

pushing u against the wall..

kissing u from ur collarbone to ur navel..

sliding ur panties off...

licking inbetween ur thighs..ur legs spread on the table..

and when ur body starts to shake..

i wont stop...ill keep going

harder...faster...deeper...

finger stroking inside u...till i feel u flowing...

thats when i turn u over

and put it deep inside ur belly...

till i got u climbing the wall...

and i gotta turn up the volume on the telly..

over and over

over....and over...

we got the whole room shaking..

and i wont let u run from it...holding u in place..arms underneath ur shoulders...

i feel it..

baby i know u feel it too...

bodies shaking...deep penetration...

anybody listening would think it was killing u...

and when ur love is spent..

id carry u upstairs and lay u in my bed..

id hold u till u fall asleep..

on my chest ud rest ur head...

if only ud let me show u..

how good i could make u feel..

im everything uve been telling ur friends u want..

im more than ull ever need...

U'll never be lonely again..x

2011-10-11T16:52:00.001-07:00

“It’s like seeing someone for the first time, and you look at each other for a few seconds, and there’s this kind of recognition like you both know something. Next moment the person’s gone, and it’s too late to do anything about it.” — Jack Foley (George Clooney)

2011-10-11T16:50:00.000-07:00

I check my phone for a text i already know im not getting

and when my phone rings my heart flutters cus it might be u..i should know better..but i cant help expecting..

Looking forward to tomorrow cus with it comes the possibility that u might wanna see me too..

I try to not miss u..but my heart perks up at the mere thought of seeing u..

Im still listening..trying to hear ur voice in the silence..

hoping for us to be together someday..even tho i know hoping is pointless.x

...

2011-09-21T14:04:00.000-07:00

Hello There...

hope u had a relatively stress-free day..and ure good n sht like that..

even though i care a lot about ur welfare, i'll cut to the chase..

My1st mixtape is dropping in a few weeks....shouts out to Odera "Dopepope" Nwihim, Tamuno Cookey, the Makramz, Toks Sotomi and a few other ppl im probably leavin out by accident.

*sips tea and looks sheepish*

Music is my passion, if i had my way id spend my the rest of my life doin it and not bother with a 9-5

but man must chop..to stay alive

lol..

id really appreciate your support in a little while..my pages will be up in a few days and in a few days... im gna drop one of the tracks off the mixtape, just for your exclusive listening pleasure...

yes.

so if u like what u hear show your support, feedback is always appreciated

show me some of that love i know u got inside

...ure gna love it i promise.

u will.

in the meanwhile..i wrote a lil something..

(Real G's write poetry from time to time bro...dont watch dat)

ok..

Here goes...

"I write u a million songs in my head when u smile at me..

...u dont even understand..

U give my butterflies, butterflies..

it always trembles a little ..when u hold my hand...

who says ure not beautiful?

id fight that person to the death..

id give u everything..if i had it all..

if u ever required it..id even give u my last breath...

every man that kissed u before me..

he didnt do ur lips justice...

he didnt touch u like he loved u..he didnt kiss u like thats all he wanted to do..

id hold u so close..even air couldnt get inbetween our bodies..

tha mandem stay tryna hit that

and sometimes u let them get their way..

i just want to keep that..

cus i recognise a good thing..and id be damned if i let it get away...

i feel like adam when he first saw eve..

i wanna meet ur mother..

cliche ..but i know ure the one for me..

cus in my eyes theres no other..

Truth is in the moment..we may not have a tomorrow..

..but thats where the future Lies..

ure evrything i always wanted...and even the bits i didnt want before..i want them now

..and i dont even see u as "future girlfriend"...i see u as "future wife"..

but i act all casual..

and text u back saying "yea itd be cool to hang out sometime"

lol but one day..im gna bite ur lip gently...and squeeze ur bum...

and when that happens, just know..thats my way of informin u

..."Now ure All Mine"

...x

lol

#TheVelvetRoom

The 1st of Many mixtapes..

Coming soon...

2011-09-03T17:44:00.001-07:00

Perfection..

2011-09-01T22:06:00.000-07:00

Perfection isnt a facial structure

its not even symmetry...

cus if it was it would be redefined everytime u smile..

the sum of its parts..

or something in the parts themselves?

everytime u walk towards me..i see u coming down an aisle..

I see Gods passion in His work...

everytime i look at u...

I never mean to stare..but i cant help it...

only one u..and ure nothing like ive ever seen

unlike other precious jewels..i cant esteem ur value..

could even put u on a scale ..cus ud melt it..

everytime i look at u...

i wanna make babies with u..

My body cant wait to be inside urs..

i cant even front with u..

all u do is take one step in my direction

and my heart lets u in like those automatic sliding doors...

i dont mean to be cheesy or corny

if u knew me better ud know this...

but ever since destiny introduced u into my life..

my hearts been put on notice...

they say u dont love a woman because she is beautiful...

..she becomes beautiful becuase u love her...

..fairplay..but its only becuase they havent met u yet..

ure so special girl...ur beauty cant be compared to another..

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder

I see Perfection every time i be hold her

something about u is everything..

and i cant help but smile..when i picture u in my reflections...

..Perfection doesnt define u..

U define Perfection...

..x

Hurt people...hurt people..

2011-08-31T08:48:00.000-07:00

She had so much potential..

She still does..

But all she sees in herself are the lies he told..

She wishes she could go back to the start..before she became this cold..

She was young...tender heart learning how to love..

He was her first..and she didnt know how to hold back..

She thought it would last forever..he promised her it would..he said those 3 words..

So she gave him everything..she made him the centre of her world..

But right before happily ever after..things changed..

Love started to hurt..

She wished he could see into her heart ..pull her in his arms and kiss away her fears.

but instead he pushed her away ..broke her down with his words..turned his back on her tears..

Eventually she moved on..

She had to let him go...

but somethings gone inside her..and she fears she'll never get it back

i see it in her eyes ..but she denys it everytime i ask..

she thinks she's forever under his spell and he'll never let her go

but shes the one holding on..

afraid to let go of the memories..incase she never gets to feel that way again..

and even though the memories hurt..sometimes she shudders..cus she finds herself enjoying the pain

Im no saint ...im bad baby ...real bad..

ive made mistakes..lost out on love a time or two..

but i felt something come alive deep within me..the moment our eyes met..

u felt it too...cus neither of us could look away..around my heart..u made the ice melt...

its funny that ive never met ur ex, but i want to punch his teeth down his throat..

cus someone else is probably feeling the same way about me..

Good intentions never win..i never meant to hurt anyone..i just couldnt give them what was missing

could understand why they were so eager to give me their hearts, knowing how clumsy i was..i didnt mean to break any of them i protest...but karma wont listen..

It pisses me off, when i tell u ure beautiful...and u look away like im lying..

i wonder how u cant see what i see..

and even though my kisses make ur knees weak..theyre not enough..even my hugs arent warm enough to melt ur heart...

i try to be patient and understanding...but i hate how u make me feel..u dont even miss me when we're apart..

I know how this is going to end..but my heart tells me shes the truth..

but thats where hope lies..

i want to heal ur heart..and if its broken beyond repair..ill give u mine..

but im tired of reaching out to u..and meeting a brick wall all the time..

i know ure hurting..pent up anger and frustration ure afraid one day will consume u

i wish u gave me a chance to help u make new memories...

cus i Love u enough to just be your friend and nothing else..but ud rather hold unto the pain...

cant blame u..but its a choice u see...u can only push someone away before one day u realise that theyre gone..

this note is my goodbye...and ull never see me again

i feel my heart breaking in my chest..and i left the pieces on the floor for u...cus it will always be yours...it hurts so much to walk away..

this is my punishment..and ill take it like a man..i will always love u ...and i hope u find happiness someday...

Goodbye my darling..x

2011-08-30T14:40:00.000-07:00

Love...

Love is my mother with a 1st class and a Phd..the best of her peers...setting her career back 10 years to raise my sister and I

Love is sacrifice...

Caring so much about someone their needs become urs..

Love is unselfish...

cus ur heart and life is so deeply connected to another persons that u get satisfaction from satisfying their needs..

.. Love is also Selfish..

because when u value something u never want to lose it...

Love isnt about what the other person has done...

Love is the reason you take them back..

Love usually has nothing to do with sex...take the physical away..and u start to realise what love is

A lotta young people..(myself included) dont understand Love..we generally tend to fall for the ones who dont want us as much as we want them...thats not love..that has to do with pride...and maybe acceptance..

ive only said "i love u" to a few people in my life other than my family..but even now i still feel like i owe them something..those words are heavy

cus i feel like "i love you" is more than a statement..its a promise.

Rollercoaster

2011-08-27T15:28:00.000-07:00

The Highs..

Remember the butterflies?

the excitement..the realisation that in a world full of billions of people..

u had one to call...."All Mine"

Remember the latenight telephone conversations?

knowing u felt it, but wondering if this was the right time to say"I love u"

and the tingles of pleasure those words sent up ur spine..

Remember how it felt..that first kiss..

the desire u felt in ur belly as their fingers claimed ur body

that deep satisfaction words couldnt explain

Remember the pleasure a simple hug gave u

holding hands and looking into love filled eyes

ur name has been urs all ur life..but on their lips it was more than the same..

Cus u heard more than ur name...

U heard forever..

But all good things come to an end..

and u knew this cus u started to miss them even when u were together..

When Love hurts its the worst kind of pain

its like u dont live anymore..u exist..and nuthins the same..

The Lows..

Remember the fights?

The words u thot u meant but u really didnt

u just wanted to hurt them as much as they were hurting u

Remember wanting them

Needing them..but pride stopped u from calling..reaching out

Thots holding back sleep as u lay there..doubts..wondering if they still want u

Remember that text

"we need to talk"

The one u knew would come but still filled u with dread

Remember the moment u finally realised it was over

weeks after it ended..when ur heart finally gave up hope

and u felt like ur world ended and sometimes wished u were dead

Bittersweet memories..

Surfing the highs..u feel nuthin could be better

trapped in the lows..u feel nuthin could be worse

Love....Emotional Rollercoaster

Beautiful coin with two faces

one side a gift..the other a curse..

The greatest adrenaline rush..

strong enough to bring the bravest thrill seeker to their knees

The fall could break ur heart..

I remember the Highs..

I try but i cant forget the Lows

i really hate that part..

i want to find the courage to get back on again..

but i keep bitching out..

cus i dont think i have one more fall in me...

thats all i keep thinking about ...

so ill just sit back..and watch other people have all the fun..

and if anyone asks..ill say "maybe one day"..x

2011-08-16T20:49:00.000-07:00

Uve been stressing all week..

Back and Body aching...

But i understand its that time of the month...

In an Emotional park...

I try not to push u..as u play on the mood swings..

But..

Tonite is the Night....

I knew it the moment i walked in and saw u in ur lingerie..

taking ur body in my arms...

Kissing u so deep I forget to breathe...

Writing a love letter on ur skin with my fingertips..

My tongue making promises on ur skin..

My lips making love to ur neck..

My legs spreading ur legs...

as my love muscle slides inbetween..

Taking ur lower lip inbetween my teeth..

My warm skin pressed against urs..

Hard..Slow...Deep..Fast..Thrusts..

Ur nails in my back and u cum-in like open doors..

Pushing ur legs back..folding u in half

...and putting my dick right through the middle..

my body pinning urs to the bed...

...as i fuck u into multiple...

licking the sweat off ur breasts..

.. grazing ur nipples with my teeth...

....my lips on ur thighs...

ur fingers in the sheets....

holding ur legs up...

warm tongue massaging inbetween ur thighs..

ure so wet..licking on ur clt sending waves of pleasure thru ur body..

taking u all the way to the brink...

thats when u feel it....

choclate sliding in pink

filling u up...

deeper and deeper till u feel u cant take it..

..ur hands in front of ur knees...

my hands on ur hips..pounding that kitty..like im tryna break it..

giving u everything uve been aching for..

satisfaction..all u need and then a little more..

in moments u lie in my arms asleep...

in the wake of an orgasm that exploded in ur very core..

Tonite we went all in..

I'll be back in it in the morning..

Sweet dreams my darlin

..x

2011-06-22T19:44:00.000-07:00

..Loves a cocktail...

...ill show u how to mix it..

..i'll place my broken heart in ur open hand...

cus u know how to fix it...

pick out the lies...

in the cracks ...and out of the broken pieces...

id buy a stable full of horses..

if i could turn them into wishes...

or kisses....

i get so lonely sometimes...

like a flower locked away in a darkroom

all i have are memories of sunshine...

ive been let down before

but will i let that define me?

i keep playing hide and seek with my feelings..

how can i expect love to find me?

a bunch of feelings that i dont show...

wishing i could force all these secrets out of my heart..

will i know how to love the right one..?

walking circles in the wrong direction..endin anythin before it gets a chance to start...

i want to love so bad...

but my mind wont let me ...

My heart used to be loves advocate..

f..l of and for love...now it just feels empty

when u believe a lie to the point where it becomes the truth...

is it still a lie?

and when the thots start to hurt..i escape into a glass of wine..

and after the green burns she wraps her legs around me..and i close my eyes..

and melt into her...

and put all this pain inside her...

her warmth takes over me..

living from high to high

this cant be life...

Xiana's bed..

2011-06-19T16:48:00.000-07:00

I watch them come in...both a little tipsy...

his lower lip inbetween her teeth as things start to get steamy...

They leave each others clothes around the room locked in the embrace of love..

and i hold their trembling bodies as i turn my gaze to the ceiling above...

He tells her all the things he knows she wants to hear...

I know shes terrified of losing him..and secretly fears that one day she'll wake up and he wont be there...

One day her fears come true...

its me, dont worry baby..its not u..

The first night is the worst ...she woke the sun with her sobs...

I cuddled her ...we nearly drowned in her tears...her heart robbed of its love..

She tried to get others to replace u..it was never the same..

And some times in her sleep..her lips whispered your name...

they could never match up to the memory of u..they left as almost as soon as they came...

and when they left...my pillows collected her tears..i felt her pain...i shared her shame...

Wishing..i could be the one for her...wishing i was more...

longing to take the pain of her broken heart away..just so she wouldnt cry anymore

U dont know how lucky u are...

All i ask...

Please dont break her heart..Realise u mean as much to her...as she means to me...

Come back to her..make her happy again..let love heal her broken heart and set her free..

i just want to see her happy..but if u dont want to...

we'll get through this and one day she'll forget she even had u..

But...

she still loves u...

and i guess that matters more than anything else ive said..

So if you can find some love in ur heart for her...please come back...

till then...

Yours Sincerely,

Xiana's bed.

2011-06-19T16:15:00.001-07:00

Some men make their women feel worthless by calling them names, sometimes even physically abusing them and making them feel ugly...

they do this sht becuase this is how they really feel about themselves..and they hope they can decieve u into thinking u can never do better...

Sadly..in many cases...it works.

Broken Toy

2011-05-26T11:34:00.000-07:00

Was i wrong for loving u too much?

Wanted to spend the rest of my life with u...

They say good things come to those who wait..

So i kept sleeping foolishly thinking this dream i was living in would come true...

I saw the signs...but my heart lied to my mind...

I explained them away....

"Dont throw the baby away with the bath water"

I saw the lies..but i strained them away...

the ones u told me...

And the ones i told myself...

Now ure done playing with me..

Like a broken toy u put me back on the Shelf...

Sitting here in the dark..

Wondering why u didnt Love me...

Shadows of doubt in the dark...

Will anyone ever Want me?

Memories of how warm i kept u...

While u slept beside me...

And if u call me a fool...rightly so...

cus i would willingly go back with u...if u ever came back to find me..

But with nuthin but memories to keep me company

i sit here..in the dark..

Like a broken toy..

Singing Love songs to my broken heart

..x

Love-Hate..

2011-05-24T03:23:00.000-07:00

U slap me...

U slap me again...

I never flinch...My angry gaze pierces urs...

U smack my arm...

I grab urs...

U try to wrestle me and end up on the floor...

Im right there beside u..

Pinning u to the floor with my body...

U try to buck me off..then u glare at me and whisper i hate u...i glare back and whisper...i hate u more...

My whispered words caressing ur lips as mine sweeten them with a kiss....

Ur hands push me...ur legs lock against mine ..but ur lips dont resist..

My tongue wrestles with urs..till ur body surrenders to me..as i take u on the floor...

Ur nails digging into my back..

Ur legs wrapped around my waist..

My body thrusting deep inside urs...

Each stroke makes u shudder..

Teeth meeting muscle as u bite my shoulder..my lips on ur neck making u wetter

Trembling thighs..muscles taut...as my body explodes..deep inside urs..

Stroking ur hair...as u stroke my face...

Lying naked in my arms..

Inbetween kisses again u whisper i hate u...but gazing in ur eyes..i see..in this moment...

....uve never loved me more...x

Broken Wings..

2011-05-24T02:56:00.000-07:00

On the wings of ur Love..

I'd fly up to moon...

I was walking on air..

Floating down the street with hearts in my eyes...

When u held my hand...i swear i could leap over buildings that werent too large..

ud snuggle up to me..and put ur nose in my neck ..and ur hand in my chest ..u made me feel like the man in charge..

I was the luckiest man alive..then u walked out of my life..

my magic carpet was pulled out from under me...and i started to plummet from the sky..

for a moment i was stuck in mid-air..in a land called limbo..couldnt believe u were gone..

u got me goin thru each day ..eyes to heaven...searching for the sun..

eyes searching the clouds..beyond whom i once soared..

then everything came crashing down as u took the base out of my world..

i was a fool for building castles in the sky..

cus love paid my debt to gravity..

till ur love left me..gravity wrenched me back into reality..

face against the concrete...wondering where my wings went...and i realised i(t) was all a-loan

people walk past me...some stop..some point...most stare..

i dont even want to get up..i just want to lay there..

defeated..but i rise slowly to my feet..and keep placing one foot in front of the other..

taking nothing with me but lessons learnt..walking thru each day..till i find my broken heart a home...

But still sometimes...in quiet moments...i remember how it used to feel...

The highs...The Lows...strapped in beside u..ur body in my arms...ur smiling face mirroring mine

...On Love's Ferris wheel...

Forever isnt supposed to have an ending

ironically sht got real when u started pretending..

But i walk on...remembering once i used to fly...

Had to give back my wings when u said goodbye...

i keep placing one foot in front of the other..i walk on Alone..

taking nothing with me but lessons learnt..walking thru each day..till i find my broken heart a home...

..x

2011-05-10T16:40:00.000-07:00

U havent had it in a while...

Ur bodys yearning for ur mans touch...

Ure lonely...u just had ur visitor..

and ur emotions are actin up...

U miss me...

I Miss u too...

I came home early for you..

U dont even wait for me to take my bags upstairs

U press ur lips and ur body against mine..

Making its requests... tellin me what u want me to do.. to u

Pushing u against the wall..

Pushing ur panties to the side..

lifting u unto me..

u gasp and ur fingers press into my back as i slide inside...

rocking u against me..

filling u up in the way uve been missing

ure dripping all over me..body shaking

as im thrusting..lips and bodies kissing

as ur body starts to shake

i lay u on the floor as ur ankles meet behind my back

hands on my bum pulling me in deeper

as the waves start to lap against u..body leaking like a tap

i feel u coming and i drill u with speed that would put a rabbit to shame..

u scream hits the air...and is quickly followed by my name...

ur eyes meet mine..and i know exactly how much u missed me..
n im glad im here...

i stroke the sweat of ur brow..dip my head and kiss u...
u wrap ur arms around me ...and i pick u up and u whisper to me as icarry u up the stairs..

"Welcome home baby"

....x

Slow Dance...

2011-05-09T19:29:00.000-07:00

Can't front...
ive been trying not to let u catch me staring...

watching u sway past me...
every thing on point from ur shoes to ur earings

Wow...

Gazing at u with hearts in my eyes..
disney love
I wonder what ur name is...

Surrounded by ur friends..but ur eyes always find mine..
dancing slowly and then lookin up at me as if to say "boi..dont u wanna claim this?"

i do..

u dont even understand how much...

watching ur lips purse as u sip ur drink..
biting mine ...longing for their touch..

*facepalm*

Walking over to u is the hardest thing..mind playin out different scenarios..wrestling with the fear of rejection
but..ur body's calling me..and its getting excellent reception

Close enough to whisper in ur ear..but as i start to speak..the dj plays ur song..i know this by the way u scream n grab me..
Following u unto the dancefloor..ignoring the butterflies doin the macarena in my tummy..tryn to act all cool and nonchalant..this performance wouldnt win a grammy..

The Music flowing through our bodies
My eyes close as your body moves against mine...

Lost in the melody..

Ur arms over my shoulders..
My lips on ur neck..sending tingles up n down ur spine..

I wish i could live in this moment forever..

Swaying to the beat...
such a pretty picture..and this dancefloor is our frame

the crowd gets inbetween us..
but i always find myself in ur arms..drawn to u like a moth to a flame..

In this moment...
Time stands still..

My hips grinding against urs..
the wall helping me hold ur body in place...
Ur face buried in my neck..breathin me in..
In my arms ure perfect..and when ur eyes find mine ..i melt under ur gaze..

U smell so good..u feel even better..
i dont want to get carried away so i fight the urge to run my fingers through ur hair
i fight the urge to kiss u..

but as u tilt ur chin up...ur lips part as soon as they meet my gaze...and ur face looks up into mine
................i surrender..
my lips find urs..and ur body trembles against mine..
my hands cup ur face..and i just stand there and kiss u

ur hands on my chest...my hands gently cupping ur bum
one hand moves to the back of ur neck..playin in ur hair...as my lips move to the rhythmn of ur tongue

Something pulls u away from me..
and as we break away..i open my eyes..
and see those banshees u call friends..
dragging u Lord knows where..

biting my lip..i can still taste u...
damn that moment was everything...
standing in the middle of the music..i hope u come back..
all night i waited for u...right there...

Foolish i know..weeks pass i still think of u from time to time
and wonder what couldve been ..
then i bump into u out buying a bottle of rose wine...
its like something out of a movie scene..

one coffee...2 ice creams...and a walk later..
i let u go again..but this time with a kiss on the cheek and a promise to call ..

Watching u walk away..i cant help but feel this is the start of something beautiful..
a text comes in from u "i had a great time x"..my smile is threatening to break free from my face..i wanna type bk "i love u, marry me now"..but i type back "sure u did..LOL"

Thus began the most beautiful romance..

Happily Ever After started with a slow dance..

...x

Alone..

2011-05-09T18:33:00.000-07:00

Sometimes i feel like its easier this way...
no one to hurt but me..

The Loneliness doesnt scare me anymore
dont even need misery anymore for company...

I miss being in Love..i really do...
that feeling that the world just exists for us two

waking up to a text...talking on the phone for hours..
feeling like noone understood me like u did...noone had a love like ours

those memories make me smile..even though my heart aches
but i tell myself..its for the best..atleast this way is safe..no more heartbreaks

So everytime anyone gets close..i bolt...and lock the door
told myself so many lies i dont even know what the truth is anymore

Wishing i could let myself connect on a level deeper than sex
telling myself ..its best this way..i dont want another ex

i feel like im my own enemy ..i dont even know how to get out of my own way
kneeling infront of u..my arms around u..my head against ur stomach..i want to ask...no beg u to help me...but i know if i did,ud ask me how...and i wouldnt know what to say

so i walk away...cus i dont want to complicate ur life..
but all my heart yearns for is one to call my wife

ive loved and ive lost..
but that wont be the end of me..i need to let myself trust

cant keep running..

i dont want to end up Alone...

2011-05-09T18:07:00.001-07:00

Nowadays...too many words have lost their meaning...cus too many people say things they dont mean..

2011-05-09T18:05:00.000-07:00

Im not the type to express feelings...i usually supress them...

Im not the type to run from intimate moments ...i usually suggest them...

Dont know what it is about u..

I remember the first time we met..

Across a crowded dancefloor..my eyes locked on u...and wouldnt let go..

Something about the way u look at me..like u can see into my very soul...lets me know u could touch my heart and nah' let go..

U could be the one...

Im not used to butterflies...

I hate how weak my knees become when i kiss u..

And i hate the fact that ..ure barely out the door yet..but i already miss u..

Im in like with u...

Uve been hurt before..and so have i...ur hearts been broken in the same place as mine...(Trust)

And even though uve probably heard these words before..i wanna use them like its the 1st time

See a lotta people say a lotta things they dont mean..thats why a lotta words have lost their meaning...

I feel something for u..which lets me know that u could melt my heart and cause those 3 words to melt from my lips..and u wont doubt them..cus my actions would already hv shown u their meaning..

I would use those words like theyve never been used before..

I'll love u till ure satisfied...then ill love u a little more...

Im as scared as u are...i just try not to let it show..

I dont even know if ill send this..if itll ever get to u..and if ull ever know..

Love is a scary thing..putting ur heart in someone elses hands..knowing theres a chance theyll break it..

But as the saying goes...a chance is like a picture..ull never know how itll turn out ..until u take it...

..x

2011-05-09T18:02:00.000-07:00

Set the stage..we both shower...a glass of wine in ur hand...ur body wrapped up in a fluffy bathrobe..music softly playin...streetlights shining in thru cracks in the drapes illuminating the room..

Conversation flowing ....between our lips...between our eyes...and between our bodies..everytime u smile..i wanna taste it...

Candlelight to set the scene flickering flames dramatizing ur curves...shadows playing peek-a-boo with ur body..

I ask u to lie on ur belly...as i take the bathrobe off..drippin oil on ur back as my fingers start to massage from ur lower bk up to ur shoulder blades..

Straddling u..so u can feel the bulge in my pants against ur bum..bending over u gently biting ur earlobe and whispering in ur ear...

Ure so Beautiful...

Kissing the back of ur neck...ur shoulders...tongue dipping in the hollow of ur back...gently biting a buttcheek..makin u giggle

Kissing the back of ur thighs...tickling the back of ur knees with my tongue..lol..making u squirm n wiggle..

Lol..

Turning u over...my lips thirsting for urs..my mouth find urs in the darkness and as our body's press against each other and u moan into my lips i swear i can taste the essence of ur very soul..

Kissin u as if this moment was all i had in the world...as if this was more than i ever hoped for..

My tongue soft and flat..caressing urs..my fingers cuppin ur face...now theyre in ur hair...now theyre on the back of ur neck..slightly parted lips barely brushing against urs..

Teasing u with my tongue..

Kissin ur upper lips like i would kiss ur lower lips..i tell u 1st so u know wat im finna do to u..

Making ur lips hurt in the most pleasurable way..cus they miss mine

Desire threatening to overwhelm me as my hands travel all over ur body..cupping ur breasts as my tongue mks warm wet circles around ur nipples..

Taking them inbetween my teeth gently ..increasing pressure as i flick with my tongue...

Adorning ur body with kisses..my tongue in ur navel...a preview of the damage it could cause inbetween ur thighs...

Coming up to give ur lips some attention..taking ur lower lip inbetween my teeth..sucking on it slow ..as u drip inbetween ur thighs..

Go on n make a mess baby...Im coming down to lick it up...

Close ur eyes..get comfortable..i put a pillow underneath ur bum...i get comfortable myself..cus im gna be down here till i make u cum..

Kissin up ur inner thighs..rubbin my lips on u..over ur panties...

As my fingers slide up... against ur hips..and down... taking ur panties along wth them

Starting light and slow...butterfly kisses as my lips brush against u lightly..

..Suckin on ur lips....running my tongue all over u..in and out...

Licking up ur wetness...up and down...flattening my tongue and lickin u like im tryna wear out an ice cream cone..

Dipping my tongue inside u..fingers raking down ur thighs..blood rushing inbetween ur thighs..making u more sensitive..and more vulnerable to my tongue

Sliding my hands underneath u..cupping ur buttcheeks..i lift that ass off the bed and pedestal the kitty while i eat..

Stabbing u with my tongue..sending shockwaves of pleasure into ur body..till u drip all over urself...

Still i lick it up..licking ur thighs..as i slide the tip of 2 fingers inside u

Twistin them as my tongue finds ur clit..licking u side to side....swirling..tracing my name on it...

I place my palm on ur lower belly and gently push my hand back..liftin up the hood of ur clt as i lick it..

More pleasure than u can stand..my tongue doesnt need any batteries..lemme teach ur rabbit a thing or two..

At first u cant take it...u try to run from it...but as i suck on it... u wrap ur legs around me..and u press my head against u..moaning "right there"

As ur body starts to shake and ur thighs..buttcheeks and toes clench up..i lick faster..till ur body's shuddering in the wake of an orgasm

But im not done..

ur beautiful dark silky hair....once so beautifully arranged...every strand neatly in place...

is now a sexy wild mess...all in ur face..

as ure bent over the couch..one knee on a cushion..the other on the ground...

ur own moistness dripping down ur thigh..ur whole body shaking as i slide eight inches inside u...ur walls sucking me in..ur legs trembling as i pound..

Picking u up...putting u against the wall...ur lips beside my ear..whispering my name as i fill u up..

ur legs wrapped around my waist..as i grind u against the wall..my thighs pumping inbetween urs..pleasures threatening to kill u..

and after u cum...i wanna lay u down by the bed..the sweat still glistening on our bodies...

as u hold my head in place inbetween ur thighs..

I'll eat that pussy till u fall asleep ...x

2011-05-05T15:18:00.000-07:00

I always find u in a glass of wine..

Alone...playing Hide n seek with my thoughts

I try to drown the thought of u in another glass

it seems even sleep doesnt want me..i lie awake and watch time pass

the thought of u wont let go of me....

Memories of how things used to be..

i type ur number...i still know it by heart...

i wonder what ill say...how to even start

if i say "i miss u"..will u understand how much?

if it were possible ..my lips would be silent and my body would tell u how much it longed for ur touch...

my heart would seize the phone and ask u if u would ever take it back...?

my arms would chip in ..and tell u how empty they are now that u no longer fill them..remember how we used to hug and cuddle?..and dont ur fingers miss my back?

my bed would tell u noone comes close...my life would tell u its not been the same since u left...
my house would tell u, ur presence made it "home"

but all i have are words...words that have been uttered before through lying lips...mine, others...i wish i never used these words before so i could use them now..with all the meaning they deserve...

and as i dial ur number for the umpteenth time...

my heart skips a beat as i hear ur voice, i take a deep breath and say "Hi"...

So many things to say..my mind says "she wont believe u"..
but my heart says "u gotta try"

...x

2011-05-02T15:19:00.000-07:00

Draw the blinds...dim the lights

im gna take my time...im gna do u right

nuthin on except the music..

our clothes didnt even stand a chance...

our bodys intertwined...

my legs inbetween urs...

extasy coursing through our bodys

pleasure seeping through our pores..

ur eyes tightly shut...u moan my name into my lips

"Adonissss.."

As our bodys orgasm..

Our Souls meet in a kiss

As ur body lies in sleep my arms wrapped tightly around u

my heart beats against urs ..seemingly saying "i'll never leave u i promise"

...x

Ghosts in the machine

2011-04-30T09:45:00.000-07:00

Ghosts in the Machine..

Phantoms of your love ..no more

ur fave programs i still watch them...

that spot we did it on the floor...

feeling like such a loser..

i tell myself SNAP OUT OF IT

constantly taken back to the night u said goodbye

as ur tears and mine mingled at ur feet..

Holding on to u..

my head on ur tummy my arms around ur waist...

Damn..

i close my eyes and i can smell u...feel..taste...

It was the hardest thing

to watch u leave...

my soul was vexed..

my heart was grieved...

Who do i blame?

is it destiny...

the same one i thanked

for bringing u to me?

"okay we wont have babys then"..i said in desperation..

but u didnt want to deny me the joy of holding a little me in my arms..

u wanted me to be happy..and u made the difficult decision..

too many S's in ur genotype..one in mine made it a danger for our babys..

six years of our lives...i promised u forever..

i pictured u and me many years from now ..growing old and gray together..

how can i love anyone else...all my heart knows is u...

why did we leave it so long ...that doesnt even matter..how can i let the doctors verdict given as "advise" lie inbetween me and u..

why us...why test our love this way?..

i try not to blink..no..these tears wont fall today...

but they do..and i cry like a little baby...

hating myself for it..hating everything..

but then a verse comes into my mind...

and it stays there till it gets my attention..

and i feel a peace start to spread

in every dimension

mind...body...soul...heart...

and i feel His love comforting me..

and i know...

it is well with Me.

Instruments..

2011-04-07T17:03:00.000-07:00

Ur Lips....

Ur hands....

Use em both.....

Kiss Me....Make me groaan ur name...

Hold me in ur hands.....Raise me to ur Lips...

Caress the goose-bumps from my skin...

Run ur Fingers across my abs....Rub them up my thighs......cup my butt and pull me closer...

My Turn....

My Lips...

My Hands....

I'll Use em both....

On ur Neck...

Ur breasts...

Feel my Tongue conducting Sensations on ur thighs...

Feel my Mouth...my Tongue ....my Lips....Feel every note i form with my Tongue on ur cl...

Running through the Keys...How High can u go?

Lemme hear that falsetto baby....

in tune with the rhythmn..the front of my thighs kissing the back of urs...

My Fingers and Lips caressing sensations out of ur body...

Feel me in ur very core...till extasy resonates out of ur body..and the crescendo of pleasure explodes out of our bodies into the very room...

And as u lie in my arms...i stroke you to sleep as the beat of my heart summons ur dreams...as u lie in the middle of one ..placed in real life by God Himself..

Sweet dreams my darling...

In the morning comes an Encore...x

2011-03-27T12:46:00.000-07:00

u got a new man now...

i'm happy for you...
and i wish u the best...

i really do...

and before i close this chapter
there are a few things i need to get off my chest

im constantly reflecting
weighing my intentions
trying my hardest not to be spiteful..

i admit i messed up
cus if i was doing everything i shouldve
that would be me..instead of him...lying beside u..

i hate to think about this
id rather just push it out of my mind
and move on...

but im constantly reminded
ure still on my facebook...on my twitter...bbm..still in my life
and i cant find it in me to break away..severe a bond that was once so strong..

So he cooks u dinner
makes u feel special
treats u in every way u think u deserve

i never cooked for u..never got the chance to
we never got a chance to see what couldve been
but in ur heart still smoulders a flame for me that only love couldve preserved

U waited for so long..
holding on to the memory of me
and believing in the promise of years to come

The distance between us couldnt keep u away from me
but in the end it was my unwillingness to open up to u...scar(r)ed to trust..i pushed u away into anothers arms

fuck him tho...

He kisses u with his lips
I kissed u with my soul..

he holds ur hand..
those same hands that held my heart

they still do...

u wore me down
i couldnt resist u
i knew u were the one
the moment i kissed u

when i held u in my arms my heart whispered "forever"
when u put ur head in my lap and looked up into my eyes...and my eyes gazed back as my fingers stroked ur face...i thought u could see right through me as love poured out of me..

and i was always the first to look away

if only u knew that wasnt becuase i didnt love u..
it was becuase i loved u too much and i didnt want you to see how weak u make me feel inside..

i built these walls to protect myself
and u took them down ..brick by brick..

i surrendered to u..

But u never knew it

and u wrote me off..
as I was writing u into my future..

i cant blame you though
it was foolish of me to assume you knew the thoughts that i often tried to deny myself..

all u wanted to know was that u werent waiting for me in vain..

i want to hate him...i want to fight him

he gets to cuddle u.................kiss u....hold u...

n i think of how bad i wanted u to just lie on my chest and make me feel like u were my baby...

how bad i wanted to kiss ur smile..

it wasnt even about the sex...i just wanted to be inside ur body...

but i guess its all water under the bridge now

i hope he's everything i could have...would have....should have been..

my heart is yours..if uve got somewhere to keep it...u still are..and always will..be my queen

...x

Minute Man..

2011-03-12T18:04:00.000-08:00

months...

weeks...

days....

Anticipation is a muthaf..

Distance held us apart for so long...

on the phone i tried to tell u how bad i missed u...

those nights when i screamed in my pillow..frustrated..longing for u..

u dont understand

or maybe u do...

but..

right now...

right here...

nothing between us but these clothes...

i wanna be gentle...
but i cant help but push u against the wall
.....as my lips joyfully reunite with urs..

Body Aching....for u...

Im kissing ur lips....
but i want to go past them and touch ur heart...

i close my eyes tightly cus i dont want to feel anything but ur lips against mine

my hands running all over ur body...

i want to take my time...i want to do u right...
make love to u like we've got an eternity..and not just one night

but as ur lips find mine again..i lose my mind..

i pick u up and put u on the table...my hands palming and squeezin ur behind

kissing ....almost like a frenzy...

body's full...longing to be emptied...

my hand on ur neck as i nibble and suck on ur lower lip..

my hands on ur breasts as my tongue flicks against ur nipples..

ur hands in my shirt...on my chest...my lips on ur neck...my tongue in ur ear...

ur panties around ur ankles...ur skirt up around ur waist...

as i bend u over the table..i can see ur lips inbetween ur thighs...wet and glistening...

its more than i can take..

ripping the rest of my clothes off...
..i put my hands on ur waist and pull u gently unto me
..as i stand hard and ready behind u...

wave ....after wave.... after wave ...of pleasure coursing thru my body...

i feel ur wetness surround me..pullin me in deeper...

and every inch of me ...i mean every inch of me...wants to spill my warm seed all over ur ovaries...

BUT....*thrust*... I ....*thrust*.....DONT...*thrust*..... WANT..*thrust*.... TO...*thrust*.. BE..*thrust*.. A ..*thrust*....MINUTE..*gasp*. ..MAN...

pleasure threatens to overwhelm me

ure hands are on the table...

now 1 of them is on the back of ur thigh....

now one of them is on mine..holding it as i stroke ur clit...

now its on ur breasts...

kissing ur shoulder blades...i feel my eyes rolling into the back of my head...

i cant..

i must...

i dont want to ...but i cant hold on much longer..

ure moaning "faster"...

as my hips pump behind urs...

ure biting ur fist...

i feel an orgasm moving through my body...

and i grab ur hips and piledrive u with the kinda speed that would put ur rabbit to shame..

as ur breasts jiggle and ur body starts to shake ...i hear u call my name

i cant hold it anymore...

my teeth close around ur skin...

i groan and shudder....as an orgasm thunders through my body

moments later as u lie in my arms..

mentally kicking myself for being so selfish...

i should have let u finish..

i feel u looking at me...and when i finally look down into ur beautiful eyes..

expecting disappointment...im suprised by what i see

in ur eyes i see affection...

in ur eyes i see satisfaction...

in ur eyes i see contentment

in ur eyes i see love..

u snuggle against me ..as ur fingers caress my chest...

i kiss ur hand...then i kiss ur lips...

a few more kisses later..my tongue is licking inbetween ur hips...

turned on by ur moans...i feel myself "rising to the occasion"

round 2

....3...

and maybe 4...

is how i show my appreciation

...x